Thing I mutter to myself at Whole Foods

Oooh, ginger cider! Jamaican cider?! What's that? Meh, it says Foodies. I hate the word foodie. Who do they think they are? Then again, vina, you are holding an orchid plant, two things of coconut water, and an issue of Whole Living. Like you can talk. 

Adorable glass water bottles! That one has a heart on the cap! Urghhhh I want one! No, you don't one, vina. You have that mason jar that Steph gave you, start using that again. Oooh! This one has a giraffe on it!! Oh, for the love of Pete, someone talk me out of this. Ok, put it down. You'll just drop and break it. Walk away. You're walking away. Ok, crisis averted. 

Well, I do like coconuts. I'm digging this blue and green packaging. I AM thirsty. Ok, donesies. 

Next time on “Things I mutter to myself at Whole Foods,” you'll hear about how much time I spend smelling the bath salts, that righteous kale salad, and my amazement at the welcoming wall of pineapples.