A. I relish food-related texts. B. Sheesh, the menfolk can be extreme about food. Unicorns and stapled pinky fingers, my goodness.

Jason Z.: I just want you to know that, at this very moment, I am having the best meal of my life. 

me: Details. 

Jason Z.: Au Pied de Cochon. #lookitup

me: SHUT UP. 

Jason Z.: I just had the pickled tongue, and it was the best thing I have eaten in my entire life. I need to bring this to you somehow. If angels and unicorns could cook dinner, that is what I am eating right now. 

me: I just ate a crispy sweetbread tossed with condensed milk and truffle. 

Fabs: WHAT?! My taste buds can't even process what that would taste like, but I'd staple my pinky to find out!

Justin: I will have you know that I wrapped your cake in aluminum foil and today I was eating it like it was a giant dinosaur-sprinkled sandwich.