[via text]
me: I witnessed a bar fight last night, was in a bathroom stall with three women — flashed by one girl, felt another's boob — made pancakes, and spooned with two people.
Justin: I leave you alone for ONE weekend...
Justin: And you're cheating on me with another gay?! I see how it is.
me: Have we ever spooned?! NO. I like spooning!
Justin: Spooning is reserved for those in which extra things shall be expected.
me: I make good pancakes.
Justin: Hmmmm. That is true....
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